Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
So many bounce houses so little time
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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