I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
