Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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