Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
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