I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
