I cockslap morals
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
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