They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
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