hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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