i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize
