batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I will pee on everything he values.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
