I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
