at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize
