Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
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