I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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