I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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