hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
