Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Randomize
