My hair reeks of homosexuality.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Randomize
