I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Randomize
