I got her a Nickelback box set.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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