i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
