I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
