Well douche your snatch and let's go!
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
