no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Randomize
