Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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