we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Just puked most of my soul out..
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
