Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
