I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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