in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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