Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
