We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
