This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
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