I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
