The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Randomize
