At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
