just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
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