No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I'm experimenting with sincerity
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
