remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
