Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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