I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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