p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Randomize
