Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Randomize
