So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
