It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Randomize
