yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Randomize
