Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
