Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
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