From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Randomize
