question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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