i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
