2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Randomize
