You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
